May 14, 2025|ט"ז אייר ה' אלפים תשפ"ה A Plane With Strings Attached: When a Gift is Not a Gimme
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Heads turned this week at the news that President Trump is planning to accept a $400 million luxury plane, as a gift from the Qatari government, to serve as Air Force One. The Constitution forbids public office holders from accepting a present "of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince, or foreign State." The president has argued that this gift does not violate that provision since it is going to the Department of Defense and not to him personally and that, moreover, it will be decommissioned after his term for his presidential library, and promises that he will not use it after leaving office.
I’m not qualified to weigh in on whether the gift is legal or illegal, but I do know that at a minimum it is a very bad look and raises suspicions about what is expected in exchange for the gift.
When challenged as to the judgement of accepting such a large gift from one of the world’s greatest sponsors of terror, President Trump said, “They’re giving us a free jet. I could say, ‘No, no, no, don’t give us, I want to pay you a billion, or $400 million,’ or whatever it is. Or, I could say, ‘Thank you very much.’”
To support his judgment and approach, he invoked the alleged saying of a golf great. “There was an old golfer named Sam Snead. Old Sam Snead had a motto. They give you a putt, you say, ‘Thank you very much.’ You pick up your ball, and you walk to the next hole. A lot of people are stupid. They say, ‘No, no, I insist on putting it.’ Then they putt it, they miss it, and their partner gets angry at them. Remember that.”
The President essentially shared his philosophy of accepting gifts. You would be stupid to ever turn one down. Treat it like a gimme putt, take it and move on no matter who it is from or what may be implied is owed in return.
What should our view be? Should we accept all gifts or do the source, intent, and circumstance matter? What if the gift could potentially influence our judgement or cause us to find favor?
The Torah’s view is very different than President Trump’s. In Mishlei (16:27), Shlomo HaMelech taught, “Sonei matanos yichye, he who despises gifts will live.” The Gemara (Sota 47b) reports that when people began to accept gifts, they started to live shorter lives.
Does this mean we should rejects all gifts? Should we reject a gift when we host someone to sleep in our home or have them for a meal? Should we send a gift back if a person we did a favor for wants to show their appreciation? Should we insist on paying for ourselves at the end of each meal, even if we are being treated for our birthday, a special occasion or no reason at all? Should those celebrating a simcha not accept gifts?
Rashi explains that the inclination to reject gifts conditions you to avoid what isn’t yours and therefore protects one from being tempted to steal. Rabbeinu Yonah explains that rejecting gifts will help a person avoid desiring that which isn’t theirs and protects one from being influenced by flattery. Rabbeinu Bechayei gives an altogether different reason. He says that if someone has true faith in Hashem, they rely only and exclusively on Him and have no interest in gifts or handouts from others.
The Rambam (Hilchos Zechiya U’matana 12:17) and Shulchan Aruch (CM 249) codify that it is a midas chasidus, a righteous practice not to receive gifts, and to trust that Hashem will provide what we need without relying on fellow man.
However, the Chida (Teshuvos Chaim Sha’al 1:74:42) writes that today, not receiving gifts is a noble practice for those who want to volunteer, but the masses do accept gifts and it is not considered a breach in faith in Hashem. Rav Wosner and Rav Shternbuch both say that receiving a gift for a wedding is not only permissible, it is a mitzvah, as there is an obligation to bring simcha to the bride and groom.
The reality is that not all gifts are the same. They come in different sizes and values, they come from different sources, they are given for different reasons, and they may or may not come with strings attached. These variables could determine the merit or ethic or appropriateness of accepting a gift.
Perhaps that is why Avraham graciously accepted gifts from Pharaoh and Avimelech, yet he told the King of Sedom that he wouldn’t so much as accept a shoelace from him. Additionally, Avraham refused to accept Ma’aras HaMachpeila as a gift from Efron and insisted on overpaying for it. Each context must be judged individually.
Rejecting a gift from a guest or someone simply trying to show appreciation, or turning down a gift given for an occasion in your life, is ungracious and can hurt the feelings of the other. One isn’t compromised by accepting it, and assuming it isn’t large enough to impact one’s need to earn a living and depend on Hashem, it doesn’t pose a threat to one’s faith. Accepting gifts when they could compromise judgement or constitute a bribe, however, taking something so significant it can alter a lifestyle or sense of dependance on Hashem, can be problematic.
In benching, we ask of Hashem, lo liydei matnas basar v’dam, may we never get to a point of needing to rely on the gifts and handouts of other people. May we have the wisdom and insight to know which gifts to graciously accept and which to principally turn down. When to pick up the ball and move to the next hole, and when to insist we putt it ourselves.